Gratitude – When We Cease Fighting Anything or Anyone

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We are going camping this week.  A much needed escape to the beach.  We will bond with our children, recharge our batteries and decompress from the challenges of life.

On the left is how our children will be spending the next week.  On the beach.  Playing.  Carrying sand.  On the right is what other children will be doing.  Gratitude is having perspective.  Gratitude is the gift of humility.  Gratitude is enjoying “what is” instead of hoping for what is not.  Gratitude is acceptance; when we cease fighting anything or anyone.  When we let go.  When we enjoy what we have because we decide to.   Then we will begin to understand the concept of gratitude.  A feeling it is not.  Gratitude is action.  We must choose it.  We must work for it.  We must maintain it. We must demonstrate it in our actions in order to keep it.  Feel grateful do you?  Show that gratitude with positive actions and reactions.  Smile when someone lashes out.  Be kind when someone is angry.  Accept another wrong and don’t retaliate.  These are the actions of gratitude.  

Why are some miserable when they seem to have it all?  Why am I miserable when others may perceive that I have it all?   What is our stated mission?  Is it to serve self?  Do we have one?  Would we know what it is?  If we did know, do we live it?  Those who suffer, attack.  When we attack we think that by ‘destroying our opponent’ we will somehow feel happy.  Maybe we will.  Maybe the thrill of crushing an enemy into dust will give momentary pleasure.  It won’t take long though before the emptiness consumes us and we need another ‘opponent to crush’.

What about when we are presented with enormous life challenges?   Are we joyful?  Do we see others joyful with less than ourselves? Do we consider what this means?  Sometimes our challenges seem like a huge wave, ready to swallow us up.   What would happen if we cease fighting anything or anyone?

The past few years have been transformational for me personally.  I have learned to let go of attachments.  I have accepted that I am powerless over many things; something my pride could not have accepted at one point in my life.  I am graced with humility.  I am able to accept the concept of ‘failure and defeat’.  This is a natural process in life.  I am able to focus on simple pleasures in life and be thankful for them.  My life is peaceful most of the time.  Occasionally fear crops up.  Then I relax and remember that our basic needs have always been taken care of.  The rest is meaningless.

We will not remember the messes our children made.  We will not think about most of our days or the irrations in them.  We will not reflect on petty arguments and they will fade and be forgotten with time.  Even the large arguments in time fade away and lose their meaning.  What we will remember is how we loved.  Life is short.  The scenes can feel long, but it’s an illusion.

What we will remember are those joyful life moments.  We had one this weekend as a family.  Our children were in a play.  Aunts, grandparents and great grandparents were able to attend.  The family was able to participate in the joy of our children as they grow through life.  The world made sense.  We had no problems.  We only had a precious moment, with our precious children and a chance to share all of this with loved ones.

So this week I will be reflecting on all that I am thankful for.  I have thanked the universe for the blessing it has sent my way.  I have chosen to see all of life’s challenges as blessings for my own personal growth.  It is all for learning.  Learn and grow I will.  Attacked I can not be.  Attackers can only attack themselves and create momentary inconveniences for some of us.  It is EGO that is responsible for this.

Course In Miracles:

The ego is also in your mind, because you have ACCEPTED it there. ITS evaluation of you, however, is the exact opposite of reality, because the ego does NOT love you. It is unaware of what you are, and wholly mistrustful of EVERYTHING it perceives, because its own perceptions are so shifting. The ego is therefore capable of suspiciousness at best, and viciousness at worst. That is its range.

You, then, have two conflicting evaluations of yourself in your mind, and they CANNOT BOTH BE TRUE……The ego is, therefore, particularly likely to attack you when you react lovingly, because it has evaluated you AS UNLOVING, and you are going AGAINST ITS JUDGMENT.

The ego will begin to ATTACK your motives as soon as they become clearly out of accord with its perception of you. This is when it will shift abruptly from suspiciousness to viciousness, because its uncertainty is INCREASED. But it is surely pointless to attack in return. What can this mean, except that you are AGREEING with the ego’s evaluation of what you are? If you are willing to see yourself as unloving, YOU WILL NOT BE HAPPY. You are condemning yourself, and MUST therefore regard yourself as inadequate.

Would you look to the ego to help you escape from a sense of inadequacy it has PRODUCED, and must MAINTAIN for its own existence? Can you ESCAPE from its evaluation of you, by using its methods for keeping this picture INTACT? You cannot evaluate an insane belief system from WITHIN it. Its own range precludes this. You can only GO BEYOND it, and look back from a point where SANITY exists, and SEE THE CONTRAST. Only BY this contrast, can insanity be judged as insane.

Whenever you question your value, say, “Life is incomplete without me.” 

This Post Has 8 Comments

  1. lldonda

    Oh yes. Be thankful for all the good in your life. I had recently had to remember to look for that silver lining or, if you will, feelings of gratitude for all I do have. Our supreme court justice, Sonia Sotomayor, just reminded me of this the other night as well. She says whenever something terrible happens in her life she digs deep within and finds a happy memory to focus on instead to get her through the day. I can’t wait to read her book,”My Beloved World,” this summer. She’s such an inspiration and one I admire very much. Just like you Larina 🙂

    1. Larina Hintze

      Laura:

      I used this reply as inspiration for today’s post. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

      1. Laura DOnda

        Sweet 🙂

  2. Nelson Logan

    And, for me, when I let Gratitude into my life — “her sister”, Happiness soon follows. Isn’t that interesting?

    1. lldonda

      That is interesting 🙂

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