I want to be as joyful as possible – to share joy – and to make the most positive impact on those around me as possible. From a small child this was and continues to be my deepest desire.

To say I don’t want this event, or this loss, or this pain is denying what is. I don’t want has already happened so it’s like saying I deny what has happened even though I know I have no power to change the past. It’s a sort of insanity to think this way.

When we deny what is – we deny ourselves peace of mind or joy. We are also focused on the very thing we say we don’t want which means we are not focused on the things we do want!

Someone took all of the things in our home. Many things belonged to others and were meant to be passed onto siblings, grandchildren and great children.

One table (with little monetary value) was carried across mountains where my grandfather ate all his meals and now his great grandchildren (our children) ate all their meals.

Art work from their childhood, (they are 11, 13 and 14 now) their baby books, special handmade pottery, photo albums and every item in our house – all our clothes – all gone.

So I say I want joy and yet here comes an excuse to give up all my joy. A “justifiable” opportunity to be lost in anger or sadness. To create a story about life – how hard it is – how unfair it is – how cruel others can be – how the cards are in favor of the powerful and stacked against the kind and the gentle.

If I say I want to be joyful, then what does that look like in the face of loss? Cry. Be sad. Scream at the stars. Then surround all the things lost with love and light. Wish for the person who took them to have as many loving memories with those things as you once did. Then lovingly let them all go for they are just things.

Experiences is what our children will remember for a lifetime. The presence of their parents matters most to them – things are forgotten. The memories of a pillow and pajama Christmas – that we still broke bread as a family – that our love and many blessings is what we are thankful for will be what shapes their world view – not having all their things taken.

In this way we address our healthy human emotions. In this way we return to a joyful state more quickly. In this way we learn we can have much joy in our heart while tears of sadness stream down our cheeks.

Choosing joy does not mean a lack of feeling. It means to feel. To feel deeply. To honor those feelings. For it is by sitting with those raw emotions – feeling them – and then consciously choosing to go about our life that we find deep inner peace.

Focus with all your heart and mind and soul on the state you want! Feel and let go of all those things or people that seek to rob you of your state.

I choose to be joyful and have the most positive impact in my family, in my community, and on this planet.

What do you choose?